08 June 2009

2 Years

Today is the 2 year anniversary of my father passing away. A day that I will always remember as one of the worst, and yet one of the most peaceful days of my life. Last year on this day, I was finally able to get up the courage to write in my journal about the day he died. I was in Jordan, and I had the day off from digging. So I spent hours on the rooftop just writing and crying and writing and praying. It was what I had wanted to do but hadn't been able to. I'm grateful I was able to take that time and write about my experiences and my feelings, though. Not that I'm worried I will forget how I felt... because I don't think that will ever happen. However, it has allowed me to embrace the present and the future, honoring the past but not focusing on it.

Today has been a wonderful day! Because I've been in LA this week, I've been able to spend a few days here with Tim and Jan, my aunt and uncle who are currently serving as the mission president of the LA Mission. Tim is my dad's older brother, and his only full brother. Though my dad has 7 older half-siblings, they are all much older and didn't know him very well. I have been able to enjoy several hours (which is rare when you're running a large mission!) of reminiscing and discussing the past, including stories about my dad, my grandparents, and our extended Blackburn family. It has truly been a wonderful blessing for me in my life. Especially on this day. I ate a hamburger today, in honor of my dad. I talked with everyone in my family today, and I even received an email from Logan today, too!

It really has just been a day of my heart filling with gratitude and love for my father, for my wonderful family, and for the incredible sealing power of the Priesthood that gives me the opportunity to be with my family forever, not just until death. I know I will see my father again. Though gone from this life, he isn't gone. He exists, and he is going about God's work on the other side of the veil. I look forward to the day when I will finally be able to run into my father's arms and give him a giant hug and a kiss on the cheek. But gratefully, I am no longer wishing that day would come tomorrow, but am content on living my life to the fullest with him just watching over me from above. Though I am convinced that he is not as far away as he seems to be. :)

1 comment:

  1. I love you. Yay for a good day/outcome on a hard anniversary :)